I guess he's not so little anymore. Even though I want him to be. I even bought a candle for his cake. It was a '6'. I guess a mom can dream.
It really is a miracle that we have made it 8 years without major mishaps. Not because he's a boy and a klutz and does crazy boy things, especially with his cousins. But... because he is allergic to peanuts and has asthma.
When he was 8 months, I almost killed him. Looking back it is so much worse than the actual situation. Being ignorant was probably a blessing at the time. I gave him a bite of peanut butter pie. He instantly started screaming. My thought...Hmmm, he must want some yogurt instead. Nope, still crying. It was then that I noticed the hives around his mouth. I faintly remembered reading something in the multiple 'how to be a totally awesome mom' books I had scoured over the past year about a peanut reaction. Ok, so Grandma runs to the store for some Benadryl. Because really, who has Bendaryl in the house for an 8 month old. Give it to him and it works. Yay for me and him!
Off to the pediatrician for a well child visit. I mention our little mishap and the doctor's eyes became huge. Ummm, okay, so maybe I'm not such an awesome mom. Her suggestion is to monitor and avoid peanuts. No big deal, he's like 9 months old, I control everything!
We are careful and we avoid and I sneak Reeses Peanut Butter Cups when he's napping and then brush my teeth and wash my hands. Yes, I know, a total closet eater.
Next reaction was purely accidental. I filled a bird feeder with peanut butter. The birds love it. Nick loved to watch the birds. I carefully take the spoon in and wash it. Put the peanut butter in the top cupboard where he can't reach it. Play a little outside and he starts to get spots on his back which I thought was a bug bite and then they spread all over his body. Hello totally awesome mom, they are hives NOT bug bites. Another dose of Benadryl, another save!
Another well child visit and we are pretty certain he's allergic to peanuts. We do a RAST (a bloodwork test that tests the IgE levels). His levels are high. He's allergic. Here's your script for an epi-pen, benadryl, note to avoid peanuts and carry medicine....blah, blah, blah. Okay, so maybe it didn't go quite like that, but that's what I heard.
Here's what I learned from my own research:
- it is one of the deadliest allergies
- peanuts are in just about everything... may contain traces of, processed in a facility...
- gatherings such as birthday parties, family picnics will require you to take your own food
- of course he's more likely to have because he has horrible eczema
- be aware of public places... peanut butter can be anyplace
Here's what I learned from living in it- You will have to navigate this crazy journey on your own. There is no one to ask how this has affected them and what works and what doesn't. If your child lives through the day, you rock. If you have a reaction at some point, you suck.
 |
| One of many necklaces |
So for the past eight years, we have survived this allergy thing. We have lots of medicine. An epi-pen in the house, one at school, one in his backpack (shhh... don't tell the school... it's way too much paperwork if they know) one at the sitters. We keep track of them because unlike other meds once the pens expire, they are no good. Do not use once they expire, they probably won't work. I am the mom at the pharmacy having them check dates and refuse to take them if they don't expire at least a year from the purchase date. Hello... they cost $325 a pop (thank goodness for insurance). We carry lots of Benadryl (this comes in handy for lots of other kids too :)) And of course we have inhalers. EMTs have nothing on our medicine cabinet. Oh yeah and clorox wipes.... I'm not a germ freak.... I have 3 kids. I'm a "I don't trust that you wiped your toddler's hand after they ate out of the peanut butter jar or had their 3rd peanut butter and jelly sandwich and now wiped it all over the shopping cart' freak.
 |
| Rubber bracelets are cool at this age |
I educate, but try to overbear. I may be lax in my approach, but here's my thought. I believe Nick needs to live in the real world and despite my mom instinct to protect and not let him grow up, he will. I cannot follow him around. I educate him. I show him how to advocate for himself. He knows no other way. He is unlikely to eat at celebrations because food isn't safe. It's his choice and I don't try to convince him otherwise. I send safe snacks/food everywhere he goes, but I never force him to eat it. I show him how to read labels and how to ask people and not be afraid. I have shown him and his sisters how to use epi-pens. Keep it as normal as possible is our motto. It still SUCKS though! Every day he knows he's different. He can't eat at any table in the cafeteria as a precaution. He can't eat birthday snacks or holiday cookies or cake or most candy. He has never complained... He rocks. He may be sad because he can't join in, but never once has he asked 'why me ?' He has some awesome friends that make sure he has someone to eat with everyday. And some awesome friends whose moms are awesome too. They call and ask what is safe for him. THANKS to AWESOME MOMS! And thanks to his AWESOME SISTERS... they totally advocate for him.
 |
| This makes me chuckle |
How about outgrowing this? 20% of kiddos do. He won't. He has eczema, asthma and allergy...the triple threat. We have done 3 blood tests in 8 years and the levels are off the chart... over 100. I forget what normal level is but it is single digits. But as allergic as he is to peanuts, we have yet to use the epi-pen (knock on wood)!
Every day I send him out the door and say a little prayer that he will live a normal life and he still return home safely. I pray the kids will be nice to him and not tease, not bully (very real worries). I pray that I will always have the strength to make his peanut allergy as normal as possible and not be a complete Mama Bear. And I pray I will always keep perspective... this could be so much worse.
