Halloween... In our house, it's not about enjoying it, it's about surviving it. And that makes me kind of mad and kind of sad. Sad that it's not a carefree holiday for us and my son feels left out and realizes he is 'different'. And mad I'm that we even have to deal with this. You see, my oldest has a peanut allergy. I'd tell you it's a severe allergy, but any peanut allergy is severe.
Surviving Halloween isn't something new. We actually don't know how to do this any other way. We've been doing this for 7 years, but I thought it would get easier when in reality it gets harder each year. He's growing up and knows he's different and often feels left out. Classroom parties, trick or treating, friend's party.
When he was younger, we would trade candy he couldn't eat with 'safe' candy. One year, we paid him for the candy he couldn't eat. Both worked.... Except for my hips. They screamed and begged for a different approach. Two years ago, we invented the 'Candy Witch.' The Candy Witch was a brainstorm developed on a Disney trip. We knew most candy was off limits and we also knew we didn't want take it home with us. The idea... The kids trick and treat and save a few pieces of 'safe' candy and the rest is left by the door for the Candy Witch. The Candy Witch zooms in while they're asleep and swaps the candy for a prize. The kids love this! (And my hips are smiling too!) AND.... I'm not ashamed to admit that I've used the Candy Witch like I would Santa Claus... That's how much the kids live the idea!
The Candy Witch, however, doesn't work for classroom parties. Nick has a fabulous teacher who doesn't allow any peanut products in the classroom. BUT.... There's always a but.... I worry about cross contamination. So he's not allowed to take homemade food or donuts or candy that may contain peanuts. I tried filling up a goody bag of 'stuff' and surprised him with it at school hoping to make him feel special not just different. It went over okay, but he then decided he felt bad for his classmates and wanted me to make one for everyone. So this year, my plan is to check all the food that comes in the class (I do this for every party) for potential safe food, send in goody bags for all is classmates. These contain some food items, but mostly non-food trinkets. And pray... Pray for a day filled with laughter and fun. Pray that he feels including in the celebration.
And while I pray, I will reconcile my sadness and madness with reality. This is our reality. We know no other way. I will carry more medicine than most ambulances have and diligently check candy. I will laugh with my kids and enjoy these moments while they are little. If my reality is teaching my son how to survive Halloween so eventually he can enjoy Halloween, then not only will we survive Halloween, we will own Halloween.